Remember that midlife crisis I had last fall? Yeah it's still going on. Yesterday morning I was on the phone with Hitter (he was out of town over the weekend) and he tells me that his HR guy had sent him an email about a new job opportunity (just a new role within the same company) This is not surprising, this company plays apple-cart-upset about every 18 months or so, and Hitter's been in this same role for 3 years now, so he's WAY overdue for a shakeup. Of course I never really look forward to these games of corporate musical chairs, because this happens:
Yeah. That's a lot of fun to deal with. Side effects include irritability, short temper, complete lack of understanding, and general assholedness. Except he's already been like that lately with the current position, so how much worse can the transition to something new be?
Famous last words.
So anyway, I just kinda went "yeah whatever okay" when Hitter mentioned possible new position. Right up until he said that it would involve a move. And then my emotions got on the biggest baddest roller coaster ever.
Just a few colors short of a Jackson Pollock painting
"OMG I might actually get out of Hillbilly Hell?!"
"Wait, when I imagined moving away, it wasn't to go to the east coast. Ugh"
"Well, we wouldn't stay there for more than 2 or 3 years, I can do that. And I'd get to move!"
"Hitter would never go for that, he couldn't be that far from his family"
"God what an ass, he is the reason I am so miserable! Why won't he move away from here? I hate Hillbilly Hell!"
"Wait, I'm a shitty wife. Could I really move that far away? I'd have to fly EVERYWHERE and I hate to fly. So really I'm just blaming him and using him as the scapegoat but I wouldn't like it either"
"But there might be work and/or school opportunities out there that don't exist here"
"But there might be work and/or school opportunities out there that don't exist here"
"But the east coast is one giant city running into the next giant city, and my biggest problem here is that it's a freaking city"
"Seriously though, I want to get the hell away from this damned place! I don't even care where I'm going next"
"Although... I'd have to leave my house and my pool and I kinda like them. And I probably wouldn't get anything I'd like out there"
"But it would be an opportunity to get away from everything around here that's making me miserable, including my family."
"Except I probably won't be happy out there either. I'm not sure if I've ever been happy. And I don't think I ever will be happy. Ugh. Just... ugh."
It's like the lamest roller coaster ever. Anyway the good news is I don't need to worry about it anymore because Hitter said he isn't taking it. He wouldn't like the work, it's way out of his comfort zone and possibly not even something he really agrees with. Althoug who knows with him, because he pretty much agrees with anything the Beloved Corporation does.
So I think I'll quit thinking about that. Or maybe I'll just quit thinking.
Random Internet Stupidity:
I got this in an email. Don't get me wrong, I love me some Mike Rowe... *drool*... but seriously? He's doing videos telling idiots they need to get their oil changed? Wow. I can't decide whether to be more annoyed by Ford thinking they need to make videos telling people that if the check engine light comes on you'd better... well... check the engine, or by the fact that I think Mikey boy has finally hit the "overexposure" status. Perhaps a while ago.
His voice is still dreamalicious though.
New subject: my year-in-pictures is still going, although sometimes it's not very interesting. I made it all the way to oooooooh about January 11 before I realized that some days I just don't have anything photo-worthy in my life. So I've been randomly filling the boring days in with extra pictures from interesting days. In some ways, that's probably a good thing though. Then I can remember that good things do happen sometimes, and occasional boring days aren't the end of the world. [/philosophical comments] And then there were a couple days when I had specific pictures in mind that I wanted to use on those specific days... didn't get the pictures... and then didn't update the album.
Today I had to catch up on two weeks worth of pictures. There was much procrastination of anything that others would consider "productive". Kitchen's still a mess, house didn't get cleaned, dog needs more exercise (although thank goodness the co-dependent beast actually spent an entire half hour in the back yard today without me) laundry didn't get done, trim didn't get painted, closets didn't get decluttered, office stuff didn't get organized, and most importantly, Hitter's model train didn't get landscaped. Most importantly to him anyway. I really don't care much, and I didn't feel that his hobby needed to be prioritized above mine, but I'm probably still going to catch hell for it tomorrow when he gets home. *sigh*
I think that's enough for now. Way past my bedtime.
No comments:
Post a Comment