A Photographer's Guide to Photography

Pileated Woodpecker:

(he's the one on top)



Some of you may recognize that tree and birdfeeder from the raccoon incident.  Slight change of season.  Anyway, pileated woodpeckers are becoming a bit of an obsession of mine.  We have a mated pair that lives in our area and come to Hitter's suet feeder pretty regularly.  I think they're living in the dead tree that will be featured on the 2011-Year-In-Pictures once everything is green again.  I mean seriously, all trees look dead in the winter. 

I had out both cameras, both lenses for the interchangeable-lens camera, the tripod, and my insanity.  I am on a mission to get a lot of really good pictures of these birds. 

Here's the fun I put myself through a few days ago trying to get a good picture of him.  (No, I'm not being random calling him a "him", it really is the male this time.  I can tell them apart.  And I know what their call sounds like.  I need help.  Hitter turned me into a birdwatcher *twitch*)  The background information you need to know is I'm pretty much a lazy-butt and I love to be on my couch.

Problem #1: I can't just take a picture from the couch because our windows have screens on the bottom half so I'd end up with stupid pictures.

Problem #2: I can't take pictures through the top of the living room window (screen-less) because the outside light shines through the glass inset in our front door and reflects off the windows.  Then I end up with these weird ghosty things. 

Failed solution to problem #2:

I put a blanket over the door.  Still didn't work so much.  Moving on!

Problem #3: The birds can see through the living room window so if I try to get up to go to a different window, they fly away.  Pileated woodpeckers are very skittish. 

Successful remedy to problem #3: Me falling off the couch EVER-SO-GRACEFULLY (yeah right) so the birds can't see me, then I crawl across the floor until I am out of their line of sight.

Problem #4: The only other windows with a view of the bird feeder are the French doors.  These doors have after-market enclosed blinds on them.  I love them, love love love, except in the winter they fog up something terrible. 

Solution to Problem #4, Part 1: I took off the enclosed-blind thing (thank goodness they're removable) 

Then I set up the tripod pointing out the window, had the zoom lens on the camera and the other one nearby, looked out the window and.....

Problem #5:

NO BIRDS!

They'd all flown away.  It was just as well, the window wasn't de-fogged yet anyway. 

Solution to Problem #4, Part 2: Did I mention the window still wasn't de-fogged? 

I got Hitter's hair dryer (yes he has a hair dryer, no I do not.  that's probably also a post for another day) and blow-dried the window. 

And FINALLY, I got pictures.  Oh glory did I get pictures!  Two hours later, I had a full memory card.  Oh happy day.  (have I mentioned I love digital?  seriously, I took almost 400 pictures over two days.  who the hell would do that if it was film?)  Sat down to my trusty rusty laptop to upload the pictures and pick out the good ones...... and...........

I have NO IDEA how in the hell I accidentally caused that!  I almost broke my computer smashing the cancel button as hard as I could.  I lost about half of them.  And then I almost threw my computer and the camera across the room.  I refrained, but it was a strong urge. 

Hitter gets home from work that night and is all "so what did you do today?" which is a loaded question because I'm a childless housewife.  But what could I say?  I mean I was busy all day!  It just ended up being for nothing.  How do you say "well I spent all day trying to create the ideal bird photography studio in my house because I was obsessed with getting pictures TODAY of some birds that live here and I'll see them again someday, and then I managed to accidentally delete most of the pictures.  So, yeah, umm, I didn't do anything today.  How do you feel about leftovers for supper?  Cuz I'm worn out!"